Issues In Counselling, Issues In Psychotherapy London
Range Of Issues, Symptoms People May Bring To Psychotherapy & Counselling In London People come to counselling or psychotherapy for many important reasons - maybe going through a difficult period in life, having certain challenges, dilemmas, problems. We may be faced with what seems an insurmountable problem or situation and the counselling can help explore our options, choices and responses. Some counselling issues are specific, like relationship concerns, confidence and esteem, stress, fear, anxiety, procrastination, unhelpful habits or addictions, depression, bereavement, grief and others of a reflective, existential nature - many issues are connected to underlying considerations. The therapy focuses on you yourself, who and how you are, the issues you bring, viewing them also as symptoms, their impact, why they are a problem to you, what they might be saying and mean for you, including your perspective, future potential, emerging purpose, and if appropriate, how you can overcome, manage them, what your next steps might be. People come to counselling in London with a range of issues:
In This Section:
- Relationship Counselling & Marriage Counselling
- Sexual Fulfilment
- Envy & Jealousy
- Range Of Specific Feelings & Emotions
- Specific Fears
- Stress, Fear & Anxiety Counselling London
- Hurt, Pain, Shame, Guilt
- Sadness, Unhappiness, Lethargy, Apathy, Depression
- Disappointment
- Aloneness, Loneliness
- Esteem, Confidence
- Social Situations
- Self-Acceptance
- Range Of Specific Behaviours
- Procrastination
- Excessive Habits, Drives, Feeling Out Of Control, Compulsions & Addictions
- How We Think
- Perfectionism Counselling London
- Motivation & Will
- Life Transitions, Changes
- Identity & Roles
- Men's & Women's Issues
- Culture
- Health Concerns
- Our Body
- Our Sleep
- Our Sensitivities
- Integrating Work Into The Rest Of Our Life
- Impact Of Our Past
- Ageing, Elders & Maturity - Counselling London
- Grief, Bereavement
- Loss, Letting Go
- Our Sensitivities
General Counselling Issues
Relationship Counselling & Marriage Counselling
For full details see Relationship Counselling & Marriage Counselling
Sexual Fulfilment
For full details see Sexuality
Envy & Jealousy
For full details see Envy & Jealousy In The Relationship Or Marriage
Range Of Specific Feelings & Emotions
For details, see Feelings, Emotions, Emotional Health - Counselling London, Stress, Fear, Anxiety Counselling London, Unhealed Wounds - Counselling London, Aloneness, Loneliness, Emptiness, Alienation, Our Resilience, Hardiness & Protecting Our Personal Boundaries & Living To Our Full Potential
Specific Feelings
- Little sense of worth
- Stress (also work & office related), problems dealing with pressure, anxiety, dwelling on things, distress, agitation & feeling agitated, apprehension, nerves & feeling nervous, impatience, being impatient
- Panic attacks
- Trauma, traumatised by past events
- Fearful or fear driven, scared, afraid or feeling like a frightened child
- Specific personal fears & fears in our relationship, marriage
- Disappointment & dissatisfaction - unsatisfied or rarely satisfied, disillusionment, despondency
- Sore spots, resentments, bitterness, grievances, grudges
- Frustration - feeling frustrated or unfulfilled
- Resentful, sarcastic, cynical
- Anger management
- Anger at life's limitations
- Dreading certain things
- Sense of impending doom or threat
- Overly cautious
- Lost, stuck
- Vulnerability
- Boredom - being bored
- Apathetic, heart not in life, heart closed
- Discomfort or ambivalence
- Exhausted, tired, lethargic
- Hurt or pain, shutting pain down
- Guilt & shame, feeling guilty, ashamed or not proud in certain aspects
- Sense of ongoing suffering
- Helplessness
- Despair, depression at times, happiness, hopelessness, joy
- Heartbreak
- Feeling abandoned
- Envy, jealousy
- Sensitivity
- Empathy
- Intuition, instinct
- Loss, grief
Issues Around Our Feelings
- Struggling to trust our intuition
- Distress
- Fight, flight, freeze reaction
- Intensity of our (or others) emotions & tendency to absorb others' emotions, overly sensitive, feeling porous
- Easily overwhelmed by feelings
- Tearful
- Difficult feelings
- Uncomfortable feelings
- So called negative feelings, negative emotions, uncomfortable, negative, overwhelming, unwanted, painful or "bad" feelings
- Familiar feelings we may no longer want
- Oversharing our feelings
- Being like a doormat, feeling like a victim
- Opening up & protecting ourselves when we need to
- Overly defended or defensive, closed down at times
- Moodiness, emotional mood swings, mood changes, low moods
- Feeling isolated, helpless, worthless, struggling to feel our core painful feelings
- The one who feels they don't belong
- Brushing our feelings under the carpet
- Bypassing, internalising our feelings, withdrawing, withholding, problem identifying feelings when we experience them, unexplained, uncomfortable feelings, general unease, drifting off, remoteness or being up in the clouds, watching ourself from afar
- Meandering along in the world - "getting by" where survival is no longer enough, lost, stuck, blocked, closed, cut off, numb, paralysed, shut down, in a daze, lethargy - numbing feelings or bottling things up, keeping things inside - locked, buried or trapped
- Going cold
- The pain of living a life unlived. Like an outsider or observing the world, yet struggling to fully participate in it.
- Excessively needy, clingy or denying our needs, neediness
- Shaping our response by how others convey their feelings
- Sense of being out of control, seeking self-control. Unsettled, not sure where things are going.
- Easily invaded by others or the world
- Need to be more anchored, solid or grounded
- Wanting to feel more secure
- Wanting to be more open, risk vulnerability
- Wanting to make peace with ourself or others, wanting to be more relaxed, at ease, worry less, have peace of mind
- Seeking ways to soothe ourself
- Accessing our feelings, healthily expressing feelings, fully feeling our feelings - allowing our emotions to flow
- Elevated moods
- Intrinsic feelings
- Primary & secondary feelings
- Integrating all our feelings
Issues Around Our Emotions
- Emotional neglect
- Troubled by certain emotions, wanting to overcome emotional problems
- Feeling unemotional or over-emotional, overwhelmed, emotional wellbeing, making sense of emotions,emotional self-awareness
- Fearing the "floodgates will open" if we get in touch with our emotions, or let them out, contrasting & contradictory feelings, torn between conflicting emotions, feeling unbalanced or overwhelmed
- Managing, regulating our emotions, overwhelmed by feelings
- Emotional pain
- Emotionally blocked, emotional freedom
- Emotional abandonment
- Taking charge of our emotional security
- Emotional security
- Emotional health
- Emotional resilience
- Emotional intelligence
Specific Fears
For full details see Specific Fears & Relationship Fears, Fears In Our Relationship, Marriage
Stress, Fear & Anxiety Counselling London
For full details see Stress, Fear, Anxiety Counselling London
Hurt, Pain, Shame, Guilt
For full details see Unhealed Wounds - Counselling London
Sadness, Unhappiness, Lethargy, Apathy, Depression
For full details see Depression, Aloneness, Loneliness, Emptiness, Alienation, Unhealed Wounds - Counselling London, Our Painbody
- Lost, stuck
- Acting as if on automatic pilot or sleepwalking in life
- Sense of life stagnating, as if feeling abandoned
- Being miserable, not upbeat, "down in the dumps"
- Out of touch or in a rut
- Struggling with engaging in the world
- Closed down in certain aspects
- Nothing seems to matter - apathetic
- Exhausted, tired, lethargic
- Existing as if in a bubble or shell
- The pain of living a life unlived
- Existential grief
- Lost personal meaning, purpose & direction
- Feeling low or flat
- Sadness (sad) & sorrow, unhappiness (unhappy)
- The impact of eco-anxiety, climate grief, collective trauma
Disappointment
For full details see Disappointment - Counselling London & Relationship Expectations, Assumptions & Disappointments
Aloneness, Loneliness
For full details see Aloneness, Loneliness, Emptiness, Alienation
Esteem, Confidence
For full details see Self-Esteem, Confidence, Criticism, Insecurity & Assertiveness & Confidence, Esteem, Insecurity, Anxiety & Fear In Relationship Or Marriage
Social Situations
For details see Social Anxiety Or Social Phobia & Life Re-Appraisal - Our Internal Resources
- Effects of bullying, in the past or now, at school, home or workplace
- Loneliness, feeling as if we don't belong
- Lack of social interaction, community involvement
- Difficulties connecting or "fitting in" with others
- Socialising well yet struggling to relate, relating with others, developing empathy
- Conflict avoidance
- Easily feeling disconnected, disrespected, controlled or abandoned (see also Our Sensitivities - Pushing Each Other's Buttons, Counselling London)
- Shyness concerns, socially shy
- Fear of relationships, love
Self-Acceptance
For details, see Self-Esteem, Confidence, Criticism, Insecurity & Assertiveness & Self-Acceptance, Loving Ourselves Unconditionally
- Lack of or low confidence or self-esteem, negative self talk, overly dependent on others or external factors, self-pity - sorry for ourself
- Feeling insecure (insecurity), inadequate, not good enough, unsure
- Self-doubt, low self-worth, not feeling worthwhile, feeling inferior (inferiority complex)
- Feeling unlovable, unloved
- Self-comparison - "I'm not as good as others", over-reliant on what people think
- Excessively needing validation, approval, affirmation, reassurance, confirmation, permission, recognition, appreciation, praise, attention, adoration, admiration, adulation, acceptance
- Striving relentlessly to prove we can make it in the world
- Self-criticism, self-judgement, self-blame, self-hatred, self-loathing; not liking ourself; overly sensitive to criticism
- Poor self-image, uncomfortable gap between who we are, our image or how others see us, identity crisis
- Feeling like two different people sometimes - out of contact with "the real me", feeling like a fake, fraud or "pseudo self", unable to take off our "mask" or showing one face to the world, yet experiencing difficulty being real with anyone (e.g. wanting to be authentic rather than what we "should be")
- Believing, that we are "supposed" to have one feeling, yet having another - often the opposite (e.g. supposed to be happy, yet feel sad)
- Surprised or shocked that we are not the person we thought we were
- Lack of self-acceptance, self-appreciation
- Being self-absorbed & self-centred
- Seeking a safe, secure place in the world & in our relationship
- Wanting to be at ease, content & at peace with who we are
- Problems taking responsibility in some aspects of life, self-neglect
Range Of Specific Behaviours
For details see Our different parts (discovered & yet to be discovered), identities, personal roles, dominant personalities, How We Behave - Counselling London, Our different parts (discovered & yet to be discovered), identities, personal roles, dominant personalities, Self-Sabotage, Destruction, Perfectionism, Control, Being Over-Demanding, Competitiveness, Uncertainty, Self-Esteem, Confidence, Criticism, Insecurity & Assertiveness & Our Resilience, Hardiness & Protecting Our Personal Boundaries
Specific Behaviours
- Keeping busy without giving time to us
- Procrastinating
- Passivity, withdrawing, withholding, sulking, shutting down, closing off, putting up a wall, "the silent treatment", passive aggression
- Assertiveness issues, being unassertive, struggling to take initiative or say "No"
- Unwanted impulsive, compulsive behaviour, habits or addictions
- Stuck in codependent behaviour
- Excessively needy, clingy or denying our needs, neediness
- People pleasing or fixing things, overly compliant, always keeping people happy, or making it better for everyone
- Control issues, Being controlling, blaming or controlled, blamed
- Out of control aggressive behaviour
- Attacking, throwing verbal insults, blaming, criticising
- Overly competitive, e.g. win at all costs
- Cynicism, being cynical, inner cynic, meanness, unkindness
- Altruism
Issues Around Our Behaviours
- Unhelpful character changes, e.g. when driving, drinking or in intimate moments
- Behaving in ways as if to compensate how we feel inside
- Trying very hard, yet not seem to be getting anywhere
- Perfectionism, being over-demanding, overly competitive, needing to win at all costs, paying attention to detail, fear of making mistakes, getting things wrong, fear of failure or not knowing, excessively goal orientated, over-demanding of us or others
- Excessively goal orientated, over-demanding of us or others
- The effects of our actions on both us & others
- Impulsively, compulsively acting on our triggers
- Masochistic behaviour - punishing or rewarding ourself in unhelpful ways
- Shaping our response to how others convey their feelings
- Superficiality
- Seeing ourselves acting or "putting on an act", feeling a fraud, yet seem unable to stop
- Stuck in old roles, fixed identifications
- Self-absorbed
- Rationalising our behaviour, yet not quite believing our rationalisations (see also Protective Patterns, Over-Defensiveness)
- Doing things against our better nature
- Acting in problematic ways which become stressful
- In a hole, yet unable to stop digging
- Wondering why we behave the way we do (see also Unhealed Wounds - Counselling London)
- Going around in circles
- Unhelpful maintaining cycles - what we keep doing to ourselves, falling back to old ways or patterns, wanting to change negative cycles
- Playing out old familiar scenarios (see also Our different parts (discovered & yet to be discovered), identities, personal roles, dominant personalities)
- Uncomfortable gap between how we behave & who we are inside (see Self-Identity & Personality - Counselling London)
- Wanting to change unhelpful behaviour
- Tendency to self-sabotage, impulsive acts or being self-destructive, digging a hole, yet unable to stop digging
- Creating unnecessary dramas & excitement (see also As If We Are In A Drama)
- Blowing things out of proportion
- Repetition compulsion
- Struggling to impact on the world (for details see Procrastination Cure? - Mobilising Our Resources To Act)
- Having too loose or too tight rules or boundaries
- Losing control at times
- Taking things so seriously
- Person of extremes - all or nothing
- Surrounding ourself with so much stimulus & choices, that we feel overwhelmed
- Problems with authority
- Disempowering us or others
- Always or never apologising & saying sorry, forgiveness issues
- Not asking for our needs to be met
- Avoiding certain things, e.g. hating confrontation, conflict, arguments, rows
- Our head "up in the clouds"
- Being defensive when we no longer need to
Procrastination
For full details see Procrastination Counselling, Indecisiveness & Lateness & Procrastination In The Relationship Or Marriage
Excessive Habits, Drives, Feeling Out Of Control, Compulsions & Addictions
For full details see Range Of Unhelpful Habits, Distractions, Addictions Counselling London
How We Think
For full details see What We Do With Our Thoughts & Beliefs, Our Reasoning & The Weighting We Put On Things
Perfectionism Counselling London
For full details see Perfectionism, Control, Being Over-Demanding, Competitiveness, Uncertainty, Work Obsession Counselling - Control & Perfectionism & Imperfections
Motivation & Will
For details see Counselling For Motivation & Will Power, Life's Journey, Initiations - Connecting To Our Own Inner Journey, Direction & Creating Our Own Destiny & Changes & Transitions - Counselling London
- Settling for whatever happens, going along with things
- Procrastination Counselling, Indecisiveness & Lateness; putting things off; time wasting; indecisiveness, delaying, postponing or hesitating over important decisions & putting our ideas into action; lacking a driving force; seeing things through; starting with enthusiasm, yet unable to finish things
- Difficulties determining what we really want
- Knowing what we want but finding it hard to act
- Blurred future
- Lost, stuck, floating around in life
- Lacking goals
- Risk taking
- Seeking the courage to change, wanting to step out onto new roads
- Wanting to be more resilient
Life Transitions, Changes
For details, see Changes & Transitions - Counselling London & Living To Our Full Potential
- Struggling to cope with modern life
- Adjusting to change or a new phase, e.g. post university blues, new surroundings, being in London, relationships, new marriage, parenthood, retirement, etc. coping with new role at work or home (e.g. as a partner, mother or father, working from home)
- Relationship stages
- Lost, isolated or seeking meaning, deeper sense of self
- Life has come to a head & now seeking change or future direction
- Seeking new ways, because old patterns are no longer working, needing a different structure or strategy, wanting to live differently
- Needing to change course, or move forward which can be exciting, yet scary
- Life crises
- Personal growth, development & creativity
- Midlife concerns
- Older life concerns, retirement, ageing
Identity & Roles
For full details, see Our different parts (discovered & yet to be discovered), identities, personal roles, dominant personalities & Self-Identity & Personality - Counselling London
Men's & Women's Issues
- Our identity as a man or woman, being male or female
- Men's problems, masculinity, being a father, dad
- Women's problems, femininity, being a mother, mum
- Sexuality, sexual issues, concerns
- Effects of pregnancy termination or miscarriage on men & women
Culture
- The effects of adjusting to and being in a different country or culture - feeling like a "foreigner" or "outsider", integrating into being in London
- Impact of culture, cultural issues - discrimination, oppression, exploitation, being from a different culture, religion than our partner, Family problems, rifts, estrangement, multi-cultural issues, being a different religion
Health Concerns
For details see Unwell, Physical Pain, Chronic Pain, Physical ill Health
- Unwanted habits & addictions
- Sleep problems, insomnia, disturbed sleep, problems falling asleep or awaking
- General, physical, e, psychological, sexual, spiritual wellbeing
- Coping with illness when older
Our Body
For details see Our Body - Counselling London
- Body size, shape, condition, image, acceptance
- Our body identity
- Attraction (see also Elusive Love? - Struggling To Make Lasting Relationships)
- Valuing, respecting & looking after our body
- Somatic reactions, fight, flight, freeze
- Exhausted, tired, lethargic, body vitality
- Relationship between our body, feelings, mind, sexuality & spirituality
- Being anchored, centred, grounded in our body
Our Sleep
For full details see Sleep Problems, Insomnia
Dyslexia, Dyspraxia, ADHD
For full details see Dyslexia Counselling London - How We Best Learn
Our Sensitivities
For full details see Our Sensitivities - Pushing Each Other's Buttons, Counselling London
Integrating Work Into The Rest Of Our Life
For details, see Work Stress Counselling, Burnout Counselling London & Workplace Counselling In London - Counselling At Work
- Work-Life integration, e.g. "married to work", overworking, "workaholism", being a "workaholic"
- Doing unfulfilling work
- Employment, job difficulties
- Career dilemmas
- Redundancy
- Burnout concerns
Impact Of Our Past
For details, see Impact Of Our Past, Unhealed Wounds - Counselling London & Releasing Ourselves & Letting Go
- Memories, circumstances & events over time, that hold us back
- Problems recovering from life's disruptions
- Impact of early or recent trauma
- Abuse - child, childhood, emotional, physical, sexual
Ageing, Elders & Maturity - Counselling London
For details, see Ageing, Elders & Maturity - Counselling London, Living To Our Full Potential, Existential Therapy London & Releasing Ourselves & Letting Go
- Entering into a later phase
- Revisiting our perspectives & values
- Retirement
- Coping with illness
- Life reflection
- Unfinished business, healing relationships, finding peace
Grief, Bereavement
For details, see Grief & Bereavement Counselling London, Releasing Ourselves & Letting Go & Living To Our Full Potential
- Bereavement or grief about a loved one
- Mourning
- Effects of pregnancy termination or miscarriage
Loss, Letting Go
For details, see Releasing Ourselves & Letting Go
- Effects of what was once, is no longer
- Loss of power, control
- Loss of our identity
- Grieving a friendship or relationship
- Loss of love
- Loss of interests
- Endings, beginnings, transitions
Reflective, Existential Concerns
For details, see Existential Therapy London
Grieving
- Grieving that nothing seems to matter any more
- Tearful & moved, yet not depressed
- Midlife crisis (mid-life crisis), existential grief
- Grieving aspects of our life, loss, grief or letting go of a stage of life - what was or what might have been
- Wishing we have done, or are doing more
- The effects of the world around us reducing, e.g. friends, socialising, etc.
- Other issues of middle or older life
Feeling Lost, Stuck
For details, see Lost Or Stuck
- Life rewarding, yet unfulfilling - seeking inner fulfillment
- Disillusioned, dissatisfied or disappointed - what's the point?
- Questioning our life & achievements
- Doing lots of things, yet not being fully engaged
- Loss of focus or life purpose
- Overwhelmed or confused
- Depressed at times
Something Amiss
- Sensing a gap in life
- Sense of pointlessness, aimlessness or alienation
- Sense of life passing by - drifting in the world
- Sense of emptiness or loneliness
- Existential angst, grief
Stirring, Longing
- Needing a different role in life
- Desiring a different life impetus
- Seeking our inner direction
- Seeking our home truths
- Stirred by life's mysteries
- Yearning or longing for deeper connection, inspiration or significance
- Wanting to live to full potential
Meaning in Life
For details, see Seeking Deeper Meaning
- Searching for a deeper sense of identity
- A need to belong
Life Direction
For details, see Life's Journey, Initiations - Connecting To Our Own Inner Journey, Direction & Creating Our Own Destiny
- Experiencing that it is not us, who is driving our life
- Life or work direction - reaching a "what now?" stage
- At some sort of crossroads, threshold or turning point
Freedom & Responsibility
For details, see Personal Freedom, Individual Freedom & Our Responsibility - Counselling London
Dreams
For details, see Interpreting Dreams - Meaning Of Dreams
- Dreaming & the dreams we dream
- Dream interpretation, wondering what our dreams might mean
Our Mortality
For details, see Reflecting Upon Our Mortality
- Death anxiety - facing our own mortality, fear of death, dying
- Coming to terms with our own fragile earthly existence
Spirituality & Religion
For details, see Feeling Spiritual, Honouring Spirituality, Choosing A Spiritual Path, Spiritual Qualities, Spiritual Direction
- Challenges to our creative or spiritual life
- Reactions to spiritual awakening
- Religious matters